The Approachable Experiment: Does Facebook Keep You Single?

Two years ago I wrote a note on Facebook on my thoughts on whether or not it can keep you single.  I deleted it from my account but I had it saved on my computer.  I am reposting it now as a follow up to a twitter conversation on Sunday December 18, 2011.  It's interesting how my thoughts are still similar even two years later.

Sept 2, 2009

I am starting to develop this theory that Facebook keeps you single...

My hypothesis is that the more you post something on facebook via status updates, pictures, videos, wall posts etc. the more you exacerbate your singleness.

The purpose: to gain opinions on this theory

Methodology: this note and the commentary box LOL

The reason why I feel this way is because I feel that online communities, in particular facebook, is an avenue that creates a false atmosphere. You feel that you know someone when you really don't. Too many times I have been approached by facebook friends mentioning things that I posted that they didn't even comment on...

This made me wonder... if I put too much information on Facebook it leaves nothing to the imagination. It's like, guys don't really need to make the move to get to know me because they can flip through my photos, read the background information on my page, or read my notes LOL.

I've been thinking about this as of late (still think about it two years later) but yet I keep updating my page. On a side note: I just realized that I can't wear certain outfits again because of posted pictures on facebook :(....but I digress.....

Why I worry about this is because sometimes the things that I say or do on facebook may be misread. You think I'm one way when really if you meet me in person I'm the opposite. For instances, I may make a comment on a picture which was meant as a joke but you may read it as a rude comment. If you take what was meant to be a joke as something rude you may have formed a negative opinion of me and I would never know because I didn't see your face (most times those are the lurkers that don't comment on your page anyways). If that same comment was said in person you would have got the joke and if not, then at least I would have been able to rectify the situation.

The following is another example that causes one to form misconstrued opinions of a person before getting to know them in real life. True story!!!!

So you're flipping through some pictures of a social event. You come across a picture of one of your single guy friends and you start dying with laughter. You're laughing because in this picture your single friend is posing with some high water pants (aka flood pants or pants that are two inches too long to be capri and two inches too short to be pants). You realize that he definitely lost a lot of cool points with that picture and you realize that if you didn't know him in real life you would have thought he had no swagger! Fortunately in this story this guy is a really nice guy but if you didnt know him and saw this picture you would have kept it moving...

I don't know...What do you think about this? Do you think that facebook encourages singleness or creates opportunities for dating? I believe the former.

In short, I think facebook is just a lazy way of getting to know someone and that it doesn't help on the dating scene. Why ask a girl out on a date to get to know her when you can lurk on her page?

Let me find out that there is strong evidence to prove my hypothesis and see how fast I delete my account on facebook LOL (still on Facebook two later btw LOL but i've since used Facebook a lot differently). 

Say something even if your not tag...I'm about to go to bed now and i'm too lazy to tag LOL

UPDATE....Nov. 12, 2009....UPDATE

So it was brought to my attention by a good friend that I am not the only one with this theory...Check out the following article:  It's entitled "A lady never facebooks on the first date"

Here is an excerpt from the article

This is the belief of the author...."It is my belief that our quest to find “The One” is being directly hampered by high-tech advances in communication. We’ve gone from the telephone to e-mail to texting to what I consider the worst perpetrator of them all: Facebook"

December 19, 2011

Recently, it was brought to my attention that its easier to get a person's Facebook contact then to get a person's number.  I don't disagree with this statement; however, I believe that Facebook fast forwards the dating process which would have taken a slower time then it would through several dates.  On Facebook, you can get all this information about a person with out having to ask them one question.  It's true that you can use the information that they post on Facebook as conversation starters but it still speeds up the dating process.  But like I alluded above, things posted on Facebook doesn't provide the whole picture of a person.  In addition, it may not be an accurate one.  As a result, you may develop misconceived notions about a person.  You get their Facebook contact but you don't go further because of misconceived notions.  This adds to the reason why Facebook can keep you single.  I say it's better to get to know someone in person then to develop your own thoughts of what you think of the person based on what they post on Facebook.  What do you think about this thought?